2006-08-30

I want to call this a valuable lesson, but it’s kind of hard right now:

The first evening, we – my cousin and my two relatives and me – go looking at a 1-room apartment near Beida (Beijing university). It’s 56 sq m, newly renovated and nobody’s lived there yet. The bathroom is almost up to Swedish standards. Amazing. The rent is 2000 RMB (1 RMB is around 1 kr), which is quite cheap for a Beijing apartment of that size and quality at that location. (Which is absolutely insane. That’s around what I pay in Sweden. But Beijing people, as I’ll tell you more about later, are quite rich. Some aren’t though, they’re filthy rich. Quote: “1200 RMB? That won’t even get you a nice dinner!” I almost choked.)
It seems fine, it’s owned by an elderly couple who gives us until Saturday to decide. They say lots of big words about trust, them not having other applicants and them being an elderly couple not minding small differences in money, as long as the tenant is satisfactory. The next day we go to Beida to find out about off-campus housing regulations and ask another relative to transfer money to my account right away, and the day after that call the old lady in the afternoon, saying it’s ok and that we can sign the contract by Saturday. And it all goes to hell from here.
No. She wants to sign the day after, or it’s no deal. And she wants half a year’s rent pre-paid including a 2000 RMB security deposit, so all in all 14000 RMB straight up at the time of the contract signing. When we explain we don’t have that kind of money right now – which is true – she says she doesn’t trust or believe in contracts, wants the money now and that we’re just making up excuses. After all, I’m from abroad, how can I have so little money with me? If we all “pitch in”, we can come up with the money, after all it’s not a big sum. (yes, that’s what she said.) Idiot hag. Yeah, CSN will definitely make you filthy rich.. not.
She’s incredibly rude and seems blinded by the prospect of money; a contract means nothing to her. So I could technically pay her and then thrash her apartment, would that make her happier? As I said; idiot hag. She seems to be terrified of us cheating her and deliberately delaying her time.
We get mad at her rudeness. We trusted her to be honest, not looking for alternatives, but clearly she didn’t or she wouldn’t have been in such a hurry to get the money. She’s contacted someone else besides us, despite her outright promises not to. My relative starts calling around all his contacts, cashing in on all his connections. An hour later, we have a possible lead on a 2-room apartment, albeit pricier at 2500 but at a better location. Later, we decide to go over to her alleged apartment and ask her to come downstairs and talk to us. This serves two purposes: One, we can find out if she does live at the address she gave us. Two, we show we’re serious.
We call her and she says she’s staying somewhere else. She again demands the money the day after, says we’ve taken up her time for four days (Monday evening, Tuesday, Wednesday. That’s what, 2,5 days max?), that she didn’t say anything about giving us time til Saturday (thereby lying straight in our faces) and that she had someone else who wanted to pay the entire year’s rent at once in cash (did she ever think if the bills were fake? We sure did, we didn’t want to do that.). Again, more rudeness. We refuse to give in to her increasingly ruder and crazier demands and leave the thing open. Ten minutes later, she calls up basically to get the chance to blow us off, going on and on about cheating a poor old lady (the couple owns three estates in Beijing, I wouldn’t call that poor by any means. She’s not really a lady either. There’s a word that rhymes with itch…), insulting my relative on the receiving end some more. She gives the old b*tch (right! That’s the word! I’m afraid the government will censor my post if I spell it out though.) an earful back. No apartment, end of story, and with this turn of events, it was probably just as well. God, to have to deal with that old hag after all this would be a royal pain.
So the search goes on. We’ll be less naïve this time, and not trust anything until it’s signed. If the 2-room apartment we’re going to see tomorrow looks good, we’ll probably take it. Otherwise, we’ll keep looking. I’m going to an agency tomorrow – the apartments are pricier, but there’s less hassle, unless the agency screws you over. As my relative explained to me: “That’s the Chinese for you. We all think everyone else is out to screw us. There’s no trust between people.”
And at the same time, both my relatives have cashed in every imaginable connection today in the search of an apartment for me, spent time and money on me for three days now, and offered me to stay indefinitely. How do they know I won’t just take advantage of them? Or sponge off of them without paying or anything? They just know. Because we’re related. Inside the Chinese social circle of friends and relatives, everyone trusts everyone. Outside of it, nobody gives a damn about you. That’s how this society keeps going, because the circle will never be broken – you’ll never say no to friends and relatives asking for favors, because you never know when you might need one from them. And they’re the only people you can turn to and rely on to help you should anything happen.

I knew it in theory and somewhat in practice before I left, but to see it in real-time practice… yes, I guess it’s a lesson learnt. To be a nice and good person is all good and well, as long as you’re only nice and good to your friends and relatives. If you trust anyone else, you always get screwed. Calls, money transfers, effort, time.. We’ve wasted so much on that old hag – if only we’d known. Yes, lesson learnt indeed.
I still want to punch that old hag in the face though.

And you guys wonder why I’ve been busy. I’ll keep you updated. Keep your fingers crossed for me.